Jos's
Gems
Here's
the Forrest Gump
story....
The day finally arrived:
Forrest Gump dies and
goes
to Heaven. He is at the
Pearly Gates, met by St.
Peter himself.
However, the gates are
closed and Forrest
approaches
the Gatekeeper.
St. Peter says,
"Well, Forrest, it's
certainly good
to see you. We have heard
a lot about you. I must
tell you, though, that
the place is filling up
fast,
and we've been
administering an entrance
examination
for everyone. The test is
short, but you have to
pass it before you can
get into Heaven."
Forrest responds,
"It shor is good to
be here St.
Peter, sir. But nobody
ever tolt me about any
entrance exam. Shor hope
the test ain't too hard;
life was a big enough
test as it was."
St. Peter goes on,
"Yes, I know,
Forrest, but the
test is only three
questions. First: What
two days
of the week begin with
the letter T?
Second: How many seconds
are there in a year?
Third: What is God's
first name?"
Forrest leaves to think
the questions over. He
returns the next day and
sees St. Peter who waves
him up and says,
"Now that you have
had a chance to
think the questions over,
tell me your
answers."
Forrest says, "Well,
the first one -- which
two days
in the week begin with
the letter "T"?
Shucks, that
one's easy.
That'd be Today and
Tomorrow."
The Saint's eyes open
wide and he exclaims,
"Forrest, that's not
what I was thinking, but
....
you do have a point, and
I guess I didn't specify,
so I'll give you credit
for that answer. How
about
the next one?" asks
St. Peter.
"How many seconds in
a year?" "Now
that one's
harder," says
Forrest, "but I
thunk and thunk about
that and I guess the only
answer can be
twelve."
Astounded, St. Peter
says, "Twelve?
Twelve!?
Forrest, how in Heaven's
name could you come up
with
twelve seconds in a
year?" Forest says
"Shucks,
there's gotta be twelve:
January 2nd, February
2nd,
March 2nd.
"Hold it,"
interrupts St. Peter.
"I see where you're
going with this, and I
see your point, though
that
wasn't quite what I had
in mind....
but I'll have to give you
credit for that one, too.
Let's go on with the
third and final question.
Can you tell me God's
first name"?
"Sure" Forrest
replied, "its
Andy."
"Andy?!"
exclaimed an exasperated
and frustrated St.
Peter. "Ok, I can
understand how you came
up with
your answers to my first
two questions, but just
how
in the world did you come
up with the name Andy as
the first name of
God?"
"Shucks, that was
the easiest one of
all,"
Forrest replied. "I
learnt it from the song.
. .
"ANDY WALKS WITH ME,
. ANDY TALKS WITH ME,
ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS
OWN. . . ."
St. Peter opened the
Pearly Gates and said:
"Run
Forrest Run"
To continue to good time
to be had with Jos'
friends Jos's friends
For a
pleasant visit with
angels ANGELS
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